“Till We Ain’t Strangers Anymore”
Since I deal with some sexually based issues, I often hear when a couple is having issues. I am not a psychologist or a psychiatrist and am always quick to refer patients to therapy. However, there are some great resources for couples who want to do their own work and reading.
Some of my favorite self help books to recommend and why!
“Come As You Are” by Emily Nagowski Ph.D
This book is an eye opening look into sexual function. It is geared more to females than to males, but has principles that apply to both. If you are a person who is intimate with women, this is still a great read! This was an A++ in by mind and I recommend it to anyone who is not 100% happy with their intimate life.
“The Seven Princples for Making Marriage Work” by John Gottman Ph.D and Nan Silver
John Gottman has a really interesting perspective and evolution of couples therapy and treatment. His programs are based on years of observation and research of real life couples that work and do not work. His principles are on building a sound relationship house starting with trust and commitment. Inside of that house, he helps couples to learn about each other, manage conflict, have positive interactions and work to build a greater good together from their relationship. I don’t think you need to be married to read this book and he has other versions for parenting, being a coworker and for people who are single.
The 5 Languages of Love: The Secret to Love that Last by Gary Chapman
This book helps to teach about the love language styles for giving and receiving love. It is a great reminder that everyone is unique and that our childhoods and previous relationships follow us throughout life. This book is great for couples, singles, parents and people in the workplace. It teaches how to love, appreciate and care for others in a way they most want to be cared for. He offers free online quizzes to get you started on the right track!
How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids by Jancee Dunn
This was a funny and real life read about how to keep your marriage together after having kids. There are a lot of good references to other practitioners and it’s just a good read to know you’re not alone in having some partner resentment once little ones come along.
And Baby Makes Three by John Gottman Ph.D
John Gottman reports at 67% of couples report a decrease in marital satisfaction after having babies! This book is to help build a couple’s foundation to make the addition of another person to it a magical time instead of a stressful one. This is one of those books I wish I had known about BEFORE having a baby!
Spousenomics: Using Economics to Master Love, Marriage, and Dirty Dishes
This book dives in how to divide the chores in your household to avoid resentment and miscommunications. I read it early in marriage and it was eye opening on how to make things feel fair and move smoothly in a household of two people in the workforce. If you fight over who does the dishes, the laundry, the finances, the pick ups, drop offs, shopping, etc, this is the perfect read for you!
Hope these are as fun for you read as they were for me!
Perfectly Yours,
Dr. Mo
